Thanks for all those who wrote in with comments and mails about my last post. I really needed to know that I’m not alone 
I guess that day everything piled up.As the day wore on and I saw how the Munchkin refused to let go of me, I started wondering whether by devoting the last year completely to the Munchkin I had called this separation anxiety upon myself. I wondered whether I had done the right thing indeed for both him and me.
To begin with I am all for working Moms. I just feel that the first 6 months are crucial (mostly because you are probably feeding the child then) and after that if you can establish a support network which you are comfortable with ,you must go for it. I had initially planned on going back to work six months after the delivery. (My company very helpfully also offered me an option of extending that leave to another six months too). But then we had the sudden move here. I thought of picking up a job here soon after the Munchkin’s first birthday and almost started all the paperwork regarding work visas when I underwent a change of mind. I met a few people who had recently completed their higher education which made me want to give another degree a shot and hence I am currently preparing for some competitive exams.
All this has basically increased my stay-at-home-mom status by another six months or so and I keep wondering whether I will be able to make the Munchkin independent of me? Whether its a job or college, I will soon have to get him used to the idea of staying without me.As he is growing and becoming more cognizant of his surroundings and wants, it will be more and more difficult to wean him away from me. I mean an infant Munchkin would definitely have adjusted faster than him as a toddler right? If you are wondering why I care, its because now I know him to be a very stubborn and head strong child who seems to be falling in the “break but wont bend” category. He will definitely put up a mother of a fight.
All these questions and feelings came to a head that day and everything seemed doomed.Well after I wrote that post, I happened to speak with the Munchkins Dad on the phone about some chores and he could sense my frustration. So imagine my surprise when he landed up at the door step after lunch itself.!We had a long weekend here , it being the 4th July weekend and all. For us it started on Thursday afternoon after the Husband came home early. Usually, the Munchkin’s Dad takes the Munchkin off my hands after he comes home from work giving me a breather. He also does the whole bath-bed- story routine everyday too which gives me two hours off everyday after dinner which I totally love. But the days, the Munchkin decides that he wants only Mom, are the days when he can get amazingly clingy and the Munchkin’s Dad is helpless because the Munchkin refuses to go to Dad and I start losing my temper progressively.
But since I was so frustrated the Munchkin’s Dad did evrything for the Munchkin all day for the entre long weekend.And by that I mean everything- feeding, putting to bed, general entertaining,diapers- day or night. I only bothered myself with the cooking and the hugging and the kissing.I got to completely wind down.The man didn’t just stop there, he also cleaned and washed the entire house. (Have I mentioned how much I love this man:) )
The Munchkin suddenly improved his act and started behaving like his usually sunny self making me wonder whether I had imagined all that behavior. Maybe he secretly does that to just push me over the edge!
Long story short, it was a relaxed happy weekend with everyone in the family at peace with each other 
. We were invited for a barbecue at a friend’s house on the Fourth which had some yummy food. I treated myself to some major retail therapy and got some decent amount of studying down. It was funny how 3 days of a break recharged me so much,as on Sunday evening, the Munchkin caught a cold and was restless the entire night but I suddenly found myself being ridiculously patient (!)
I don’t know how much I can prevent future such breakdowns but at least I can try to deal with them better. And I am going to try each and every one of your suggestions from here .
And although my son is an absolute brat who drives me completely up the wall at times, nothing can take away from the fact that he is the absolute joy and delight of my life 
This is just before he is about to plant a big sloppy kiss on my face
Such a cute pic, I can see all that love in his eyes for you. A delicious baby
Good to know that you got some time to relax and rejuvenate. Hubby’s support is so important at such times and you got it to the full extent. Its wonderful when they come home early from work isn’t it?
god bless em, these wonderful men!
and good to know both munchkin and you are back in the groove! and yeah, i was home for 6months and then started work. Initially Cubby was too young to understand, but i would still make a big goodbye thing with big smiles and hugs! M though i was nuts! but then as he grew up, he started understanding stuff, there was a l’il bit of crying. but he was OK eventually.
am sure when your time comes, Munchkin and you will figure out an acceptable solution!
hugs
Hey I would chill about the working thing. I honestly really believe that if you give your child quality time they will adjust to being with other caretakers at any age. I don’t think he’s clingy because you are at home, because I work and my kids get clingy too.
The WOHM naysayers would say it’s because they’re insecure that I will leave them to go out, hence the clingyness. So you see, there is no escaping the judgement either way. After analyzing this way and that way, here’s what works for me.
1. How the child behaves on a particular day or week is not related to me. How she is generally is probably a result of my raising them. But yeah even the most easy going child is going to act up. And that is not a reflection of my parenting.
2. Distraction works. But not always. Sometimes calm quiet focused attention helps.
3. Kids behave worst with people they love the most. I keep telling myself that.
4. Kids always behave really badly for a period of time before they hit a milestone. Milestones need not always be physical. Observe and see
5. If you feel he’s repeating an undesirable behavior maintain a behavior diary – make note of how many times he behaves badly and what you did to break the cycle. Dont forget to note the times he did ok. You’ll find that he’s actually quite well behaved most of the time, it’s our own mood that makes it seem worse than it is.
I must do a post on this I think – I went through some intense times a few weeks after my second, with my first becoming a nightmare beyond control. And to see her now – Gosh, everyone is remarking on the change in her.
You’re doing a great job Avanti, if he’s a strong willed child nobody better than you to handle him without breaking his spirit.
And oh yeah I *heart* Neeraj for his sensitivity!
and i *heart* your terribly sensible advice Poppy!
*applauds Munchkin’s Dad*, yes if you’re going back to work or even taking time to study, then Dad’s role will help Munchkin. He does need to do his share more often…before you and the Munchkin lose it:)
And having just got thru’ an insane weekend myself, I can relate to the nightmarish behaviour. Cub was at his worst…could that have anything to do with Mom running a 102 fever and Dad going berserk trying to fill in? Du…uh….attention seeking!